State Your Unpopular Opinions

Some of the comments in this thread show why companies are obsessed now with sexual harassment “training.”

You know, sexual harassment isn’t just about men towards women. There are men who don’t wish to hear sexual jokes, language, and such at work. It doesn’t make them less masculine, it makes them classy.

 

Awesome, we've allowed for an exception. Hopefully this opens the flood gates for 6-eyed shaman to rant for another page or two.

 

"Pop never would have gotten Mom to sleep with him in the first place if he had allowed himself to be become a victim of 3rd wave feminism!"

 

He should've used his masculine instincts.

 

Or some "roughhousing."

 

She shouldn't have worried anyway. When a woman gets raped , her body produces a hormone to stop a pregnancy. That's what one of our republican senators figures.

 

I have some male employees who compliment my looks fairly regularly, and while I usually just give a cordial "thanks", since I know that they are trying to be nice and not malicious; but I do find it somewhat inappropriate for a work place. I am not at work to look good. I don't mention if a male co-worker looks good (or a female one for that matter) unless they are my friend. Most women I have talked to feel similarly.

Do I think someone should be fired over complimenting a female co-worker? Of course not. It is also your responsibility, if you feel that way, to tell your employees or peers that their compliments on your looks need to stop.

Knowing what I know, as a woman, would I compliment a female worker of I were a man? Absolutely not. For me, as a supervisor, it comes across as sycophantic, or just unnecessary.

 

Let me make one thing abundantly clear to everyone that there is a difference between a sexually charged compliment, and a casually altruistic compliment. That is what I am trying to convey here, but it appears that there is some confusion about it in that some of you seem to think I'm advocating for openly sexual compliments in the workplace. Which I am not.

Moving on

Masculine instincts such as chivalry and gentlemanly approaches toward women, and demonstrating strong leadership skills.

Exactly, there's a big difference between saying, "Nice shoes," or "I like the way you did your eyeliner," and saying something like "Nice ass, baby!"

I think the world would be a much better place if we were more altruistic toward our fellow human being, but it seems that the attitude in this thread is that we'd be better off keeping quiet and castrated.

 

Allah is great. Just a bunch of dickheads fucking his name up..

 

It might be a bit extreme to lose a job over but if I ever said that to a coworker, I hope someone would at least slap me.

 

Indeed, the workplace is not a place where one should make it a goal to get laid. But sometimes workplace romances can occur and I think it would be wrong to inhibit love from finding a way. Finding true love is part of "getting laid" too. I once worked for a company where dating between co-workers was strictly prohibited, and grounds for termination. I can see why a supervisor won't want relationship drama amongst employees in some cases. But that, I feel is too strict.

Yes, young boys need rough-and-tumble play to grow into well developed healthy men.

 

Meh I suppose in a work environment it could cause some friction. However, that compliment has worked well for me outside the work environment though.

 

I don't think many people would disagree with you here. The real issue is: How are we, as females, supposed to tell the difference between a truly altruistic comment, and a sexually charged comment?

 

I've worked as a forest fire fighter in an all male crew. So yeah..... HIGH levels of testosterone and crude humor in that work environment. Stuff was said that I know most of these men wouldn't be comfortable saying in a formal setting (especially in the presence of ladies). And if they did say such things around women, I can't imagine a woman would react well to it unless she was a super close friend of his, (or playing Cards Against Humanity with him).

Regarding sexual harassment, people need to be called on it right away. Much of the time it can be forgiven and we can move on from it, but some seek to weaponize sexual harassment to tarnish and destroy a person. If one is accused of it: Innocent 'til proven guilty!

I suppose there's a lot of factors on what could be a sexually charged complement or not. And it's a good question. Could be in the context of his delivery; does he say your hair looks pretty, or sexy? Is he constantly approaching with compliments to try and get something more out of you? What does his non-verbal language tell you? They say 80% of communication is non verbal anyway.

 

Wow. I've missed a lot. But, 6, dude, not to be difficult, but three different women have told you why this is unacceptable, you're not listening to us. You're dismissing what we're saying, and then trying to mansplain it back to us.

You. Are. Why. Feminism exists.

 

You could be highlighting some of the legitimate gripes he has about Third Wave Feminism.

Why does his opinions and views have to be mansplaning? Why can't he just be defending a different viewpoint?

 

one of my best friends is a bartender, he would probably disagree.

 

I think "hey nice shoes" is innocuous enough.

And "hey, nice eyeliner" will have me inviting you to Sephora during lunch to do some gay best friend bonding

But I thought it was pretty clear the rest of us were talking more along the lines of,
"You look really beautiful today"
And other, similarly direct things that might be nice in a different context but come off as creepy af in the workplace

 

yeah i'm not sure how you compliment someone's eyeliner. the only time it actually looks good is when you can't even tell they're wearing it.

 

Also, this doesnt sit well with me for some reason
Most people dont carry around recorders, if someone says something inappropriate to me in the elevator at work with no witnesses, how am I going to prove it?

This isnt a court of law, its a workplace and HR has a responsibility to take allegations seriously, even without tangible evidence. 9 times out of 10 there will be no tangible evidence