Suckselfwithhose

My garden hose is 2 inches wide.

 

That's gotta be a fire hose or something.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXc5ltzKq3Y

 

It can put out fires.

 

They don't call him pencil dick for nothing.

 

Does anyone have a video of this? I need a real live visual k thanks.

 

garden hose is measured by the inside

 

Guys have had their penis de-gloved, doing this with industrial vacs (although not much else to do when you're an all-night office cleaner).

Try taking the cardboard tube from a roll of paper towels. Push a square of bubble plastic into the lumen of the tube leaving a couple of inches outside for folding back outside the tube and taping down.

Lubricate the bubble plastic. Insert a SHOP VAC hose at the distal end, insert your penis at the proximal end and use your hand to control the strength of the suction.

DO NOT let the actual plastic hose of the vac itself, touch the penis.

If your penis is too big for a paper towel tube, I guess you'll have to go to the hobby store and get a cardboard mailing tube.

It's this kind of ingenuity which makes America great.

DISCLAIMER: Nothing in this post constitutes medical advice

FURTHER DISCLAIMER: Jeff Sessions (aka the Hobbit) would not approve this method

 

my sphincter puckered when you said that - please don't hurt yourself. Better to put an active speaker against your clit and turn up the bass

KILROY: He doesn't mean speaker as in 'Speaker of the House' [though that might work too, cum to think of it]

 

wassamatta - cat got your tongues???