"that's so gay" is so annoying

say that things are "gay" should definitely go. I remember when kids used to say "thats jewish" which completely offended me and people say dumb shit like "dont act like a ******" or "thins dumb nigga" and they always claim." oh i have nothing against _____ its just something i say" well how about you practice not saying it. why upset and offend people when it is so easy not to?

 

however, as a gay man using these terms it has a different connation. in a way, i feel when a gay person uses these terms we are "taking them back" and removing some of the hurt associated with those words.

 

i think the catch phrase "it is so gay" came from the south park adult cartoon. the boys on the show use the phase when something is uncool, lame, etc. personnally, i do not like when some uses a term which describes my sexual lifestyle and implys it is uncool. it is just something young people say in which they "hopefully" will out grow.

 

Well the South Park characters aren't exactly "ideals", nor are they presented to be that way...most people don't try to be "just like Cartman"

 

this forum is so gay..
but its the truth right?

alot of people that say such things are not homophonic and mean no offence by the saying.
its social conditioning at its best, but people have a right to say what they want.
since i am in the gay forum, in closing i will say..
i personally do not agree with homosexuality, and find it very idiotic and undisciplined.
good day.

 

Yeah... being gay, is pretty gay if you ask me... WTF????

 

I thought I'd see this argument here. That is the most absurd thing Ive heard so far. When a 'gay' person uses that phrase it empowers encourages those that are not 'gay' to use it more. And the thing is no matter how many 'gay' people use that phrase, others in the 'gay' community are still going to abhor it. It not only stands to send a mixed message, but it also sets a double standard.

The same double standard has been set with the n***** word. African Americans use it day in and day out. Some of them are completely fine with members of other races using the word, other people would just as soon beat a white man down for using it. What's good for the goose, is good for the gander.

Also, to whomever mentioned not offending because it's easy not to, I tend to disagree with this because of the forementioned thoughts. When some members of various communities are accepting of ignorant speech and others aren't, it's impossible to know who will think and feel what. To not concern yourself with the ignorance of others is far easier than to attempt to not say or do anything that is offensive to the various and numerous different communities.

 

Amen. I think we're talking about intent here. Using the word "******" or "faggot", etc, in a abusive and derogatory sense is obviously never acceptable. (Why would you judge people at face value anyways!!) Used amongst friends, or familiar communities, these same terms can also serve as terms of endearment. So yes - a double standard.

I don't think we can worry about others miscontruing our intent all the time any more than we can please all of the people all of the time. Again, life is too damn short.

 

Yeah.. people suck.

 

I think the intent is irrelevant because not everyone knows what your intent is. The less inteligent some one is the more likely they are to take things at face value, and lets face it, there are a lot of uninteligent people out there. So if you use it amoung freinds someone may over hear you, and you have just reinforced the concept of socialy acceptable casual homophobia. I also am very anoyed at the casualness that people use this term, it encourages casual homophobia, ie don't bother to think about it, just hate fags cuz its easy.

 

my point was, as a black gay person, i personnally hate the terms " that's so gay", "faggot" and a few posters brought up the term "******". however, many posters on the forums express opinions of how a fair world society should operate. unfortanately, that is not reality. we should fight for that ideal society.

words said must be viewed in the concept and context of which were they were uttered and in the company uttered. gay people will say faggot, dyke, queen, sister, girl, bulldagger when fucking around with one another, in closed circles. as an older black person, i have noticed young black people, "under 30 or so i guess", use phrases such as "your my ******", "your my dog" as an expression of love, friendship, the whole 9 yards. many of people may not like it, but that is reality of the world we reside. some in the black community view it as taking a bad word and making it "ours". i personnally hate it, but that is the reality that exists.

i totally agree with those of you who posted in disagreement of some my comments on this thread. each of you that were critical of my statements were younger than i. in the ugly real world (the majority of society at least in my lifetime) ugly terms such as these will be expressed. i do believe that one day, derogatory terms will not be used by but a tiny portion of the population.

please understand i agree with your positions. i do not endorse homophobia. but, this is just another of the things that it is cool for the "hip" folks to say.

 

I agree that there will always be people saying derogatory things. However, I don't think that makes it OK. I know that there are black people who use the n-word, but that doesn't mean that it's OK for me--a white guy--to use it. If I want to show that I'm cool with black people, I figure the best way to do it is to never use that word and to speak up when I hear about racism and things that could offend or hurt black people. The easiest thing is to watch what comes out of my mouth.

What I don't like about "that's so gay" is that people don't seem to be watching what comes out of their mouth and that's about as unhip and uncool as it gets. You never know who is gay or who has gay friends and family, and gay people don't always feel safe or comfortable speaking out about it.

I'm gay and young, and I've never really understood the thinking behind "taking back" a word. There are lots of black people who use the n-word and lots of people trying to take it back, but there are still black people, including some about my age, who can't stand the word. Sure, there are people who are going to use it, but I don't have to add to the hurt in the world.

I'm not really comfortable with the word "queer." My grandfather uses it in a way that is very gay-unfriendly. When I hear that word, I think of him at least as much as I think of radical gay activists trying to "reclaim" the word.

I don't know if I'll see a "fair world society" in my life. It's going to take a lot of work and a lot of time. Not saying "that's so gay" seems like a really easy step, and it is obvious that other people saying it really hurts or bothers some people.

 

Gay = Lame is not a good equation. Was a time, you know, when lame actually was used to describe someone who was physically handicapped. I too have heard phrases that employ ethnicities or religions or race in a derogatory manner; n*gger rich, Dutch treat, Spic and span, Indian giver...
I tend to stay away from any of these type phrases (even though most have nothing to do with ethnicity, religion or race). Saying that something is so gay is actually quite meaningless to me... unless the thought conveyed is, say, something beautiful, daring and F A B V L O V S dahlink !!!

 

I don't let it bother me, really.

 

that is what you need and lots of it.

 

saying "so" to emphasise anything is fucking annoying, full stop.

 

I always come across people saying those words. I've just learned to ignore it and such.

 

I have such a great example of a Thats so Gay moment.

I was talking to a young social worker about racism and somewhere in toward the end of the conversation she said "Racism is so gay". I mean, what an ironic statement.

 

I punched someone I know for saying "faggot". He also called techno gay and I would hit him for being closed minded since all he listens to is mainstream rock like on the band shirts they sell in JC Penny's and also he's really weak and wouldn't do anything about it. But he's come around quite a bit since he's known me. It's goes to show you that the ones who use hateful terms aren't always hateful people.

 

I used to think using the word "gay" in such a context is annoying, but I've since gotten over it and have even started using it myself.