The Latest Thread of Lies....;-)

I killed John F Kennedy with a spoon and fork

 

I just sneezed outside and blew down my whole damn cornfield...

 

i was the second gunman on the grassy knoll

 

I went for a hike through the woods this morning, then forgot where I was going...;-)

 

i love getting up for work

 

life fuckin sucks!

 

I eat cake every minute to digest better

 

I was out target shooting with my AK 47 on full auto, accidently hit a gas line, now there is a huge spewing crater in the pasture field....

 

I'm on strike no more house cleaning for me...

 

I refuse to have sex ever again!....

 

I just love all the political ads on tv...

 

today i am looking for a red hot poker, right up m'jacksy

 

I did nothing today...and I feel great

 

I live with 20 cats and my house smells like a litter box...

 

I went out to the outhouse today, but it was full and running out the top so I had to just poop in the yard.....;-0

 

My outhouse has a heated toilet seat...

 

Above poster once had four husbands, but she got tired of all the nagging....;-)

 

Above poster once had 4 wives, but couldn't keep up with them sexual...

 

I don't like sloppy joes

 

I lost 50lbs this year