The (New) Thread of LIES!!!

I sneezed and I peed myself...

 

i collect large empty cardboard boxes as a hobby...

 

I've never been chased by a herd of goats.

 

I wished it would rain today...

 

i never chased goats on a hill, in spain, to get their bells...

 

I do not want to get stoned right now

 

I'm going to sale my house and buy a boat and sail around the world...

 

I have ten fingers.

 

The weather is so lovely and warm, I could sit in the garden.

 

My cat chased a dog up the tree...

 

I just shaved with a chainsaw.

 

I was having chest pains this morning, then I looked down and I was just standing on one of my boobies...

 

^^^Same here.

 

I can lick both of my eyebrows, and at the same time.....;-)

 

i just dropped the Bentley off with the garage for a service...

 

I carry my cell phone around as an ear ring.

 

I eat raw steaks every morning

 

i hate raw steak... :drool5:

 

you drooling over raw steak sexually excites me

 

I was born with an upside down nose and can drown in the rain.