The New What Would You Do If Game

Bid 3NT and hope for an even distribution (can you even FIT a bridge table in a smart car?? If not ... it's not really all that smart, is it??)


WWYDI you wanted to play this game, but the W, Y, D and I keys on your computer keyboard weren't working?

 

Hat oo ou o is the answer

Hat oo ou o if you found out that all you had been told about diets was a lie and the more you ate the skinnier you got

 

Go on a crash diet immediately


WWYDI they made Gaelic the official language of the United Kingdom?

 

Ah,BeachBum...t'is well understood that "Is i 'n dias trueme is isle 'chromas a ceann".

So-wwydi if you suddenly became impossible to understand?

 

nothing at all ( no fucker understands me anyway )

wwydi you got caught arguing with the budgie ?

 

Furiously insist it was HIM who started it!


wwydi nobody believed your version?

 

get the budgie to explain

WWYDI The budgie refused to talk

 

Introduce him to the cat! [f*uckin' budgies,acting like they own the f*ckin' place.....]


wwydi the cat farted feathers?

 

use it to dust the telly


why has it gone quiet in our house ?

 

Because you forgot to ask a wwydi question, so nobody's answering you.


What would you do if the water drained out of the plug hole clockwise rather than anticlockwise?

 

I would think what am I doing in China

WWYD if I didn't WWID ever again ?

 

I'd check my 'I' & 'Y' keys were working properly.

wwydi someone accidentally asked a sensible question?

 

Answer in the same irrelevant way I do the silly ones

WWYDI it was past your bed time and you were going to Hale carnival tomorrow , And they had a real ale tent

 

Hit the pillow-I don't drink,so I don't care about their tent.

wwydi you realised the real ale was fake?

 

" Fake " no way man ! no siree ! that's almost as bad as saying their real ale was fake

WWYDI you realized that All this time Beer was good for you ?

 

Nuffing against beer,don't get me wrong-I just prefer espresso. A Sicilian growing up in the Orkneys=confusion,y'see.


WWYDI you got offered the part playing 'the prat' in a sit-com?

 

Google prat and see if its a part i would be willing to do.

Wwydi you were at work right now?

 

Get up and go home ... I don't get paid to work weekends.


WWYDI they offered you twice as much as you earn now, so long as you worked a 68 hour week?

 

Thank my self for the time off. (self employed)

What would you do if you had to create your own business?

 

I already did.

WWYD if there was no more electricity?