The Ultimate "Make an absurd accusation about the poster above" thread!

had his nose bitten off by an axlotl that he was training. It got sick of fetching nuggets of mercuric oxide from his pubic hair.

 

Is really a quality controller's assistant at the local tea strainer factory

 

never drinks tea

 

Goes fishing in the kitchen sink.

 

goes swimming in the bath

 

Loves lying in her bath so much that she's going to have taps fitted to it.

 

is tappin' my bath taps

 

Doesn't have an open fire-so she hid her letter to Santa behind a radiator

 

is really santa

 

is really satan

 

is really shakespeare

 

And lo, just as such an accusation be made, behold! The accuser is show'n as just such a one!

And 'tis true, my dearest DesdeHamMacLearmeo, that she was the runyon who illegalised fun.

 

is really oscar wilde pretending to be shakesphere

 

Is really drinking turkey wild

 

drinks wild turkeys

 

drives turkeys wild

 

drives turkeys to turkey movies

 

Thinks Shawshank Redemption is a turkey of a movie

 

has only watched it once

 

Thinks Santa will come before the 21st this year so it will be before the end of the world.