The Ultimate "Make an absurd accusation about the poster above" thread!

Is a whore who walks the streets for money and doesn't care if it's wrong or if it's right!!

 

Once climbed a rug right to the top & stood there admiring the view

 

Drives without his glasses because he believes that if he can't see something it isn't there.

 

Is test-driving a new toe arrangement: seven on the left foot and three on the right. It's said to give much better clutch control. However, Specs drives an automatic, so cannot comment.

 

Has just been offered a really high-tech job testing pencils

 

Just fired from his job of 50 years of cleaning beer mugs.

 

Once ate a 5 pound bag of flour

 

Tried to use uncooked spaghetti noodles for chopsticks and ended up growing hungry

 

Has grown tired of eating with her fingers for the last 58 years so is looking for new utensils.

 

Invented the world's first (and, hopefully, last) Morris Dance - belly dance - tap dance - clog dance segue

 

Knows more about dancing then Gene Kelly.

 

Just can NOT get the hang of the instructions that came with her new pencil.

 

prefers to carve his lists in stone to leave for future generations to decode

 

Can't understand the pictorial instructions on the hot air hand dryer

 

is licensed to fly a hot air balloon.

 

Is really a monocle

 

makes fun of the seeing impaired

 

Brought pot brownies to their Grandma's birthday gathering.

 

spiked grandads dinner with fairy mushrooms

 

Invented the teabag