The Ultimate "Make an absurd accusation about the poster above" thread!

Watches "Swamp People" to see the alligators.

 

is not sexy

 

Hasn't had sex since 1973

 

Is still stuck in the 20th century or maybe the 19th.

 

Actually starred in Shakespeare's first showing of Hamlet

 

Is really a mummified cat, posting from a Commodore 64 in an attic in Weston Super Mare

 

Was found in one of Egypt's pyramids

 

Has a pet Sphinx

 

Ah yes-BeachBall. Her university will never forget her.
Graduated with honours in hitting expensive porcelain with a hammer.

 

Cleared the porn off his browser in honor of valentines day.

 

I have NEVER had porn on my browser.
But I DO have Oxyqueen as my wallpaper-which I sacrifice a kitten to every day.
[oxy stays so young and gorgeous by drinking kitten's blood]

 

^^Lies about having porn

 

Tunes ukeleles for a living

 

Is the lead air guitarist in her stuffed animal band.

 

is too clever for her shoes

 

Is the queen of kindness we all adore.

 

Has 76 nose rings ... all in the same nostril

 

is the ultimate queen of oxygen (too slow again better go back to sleep)

 

Has run out of things to say to her plants.

 

Eats tortoises