Three

the dude there doesn't work for walmart, he's just one of their best customers
i go to the walmart in the mornings on saturday to see all the mullets, it's spectacular

 

More like the dude.

She was fat and probably 20 something even though she looked like she was 40 something.

Sucks for her.

 

i would not feel bad, surely she was fresh out of her university and was looking for a job.

As she sat in her trailer during the spring rain eating tuna out of the can stroking her beard she thought "you know, I have a math degree, i should be a cashier"

But the thing is she never really had the degree or even went to school, she had simply switched from Prozac to Zooloft and did a little cocaine

 

Mullet-spotting. One of my favourite past-times.

 

i think i love you

 

Hah Gary

Don't forget the fact that she was probably a crack baby.

Me and my friends always play the mullet spoting game... it's very entertaining... LOTS of mullets in chilly Arkansas.

 

Reading this makes me want to go to America.

 

Does it?

Writing that makes me want to leave America.

Well, not really. I've been learning to cope with America lately... found my little comfort spot within an amazing group of friends.

Plus, we have Checkers here... which has the best cheap greasy burgers ever.

 

Yeah! I mean somebody who loves the truly bizarre and fucked-up things in life, needs to go there at least once, right?

I'm pretty damn sure that I wouldn't live there though.

 

You should come to Texas. I can take you cow tipping, and we can sit out on the prairie writing sad songs about unrequited love. And we invented the nacho. That's all Texas.

 

Nice one, lode. Sad songs, I can do. Nachos, I can do. Sunshine and heat, I can do. But what in the hell in cow tipping?

 

q

 

Well, yeah... if you've never been to America you really need to visit.

You'll be amazed... truly amazed.