Trying to find relief

Used to be a guitar player. Gave that up. Was actually damn good. I would even.say potentially great. But ultimately anxiety got the best of me and I quit. My playing has deteriorated so much now and I lost all interest in it.

The only "hobby" I ever had was racing r/c cars. But that's a dead end money pit and I gave that up too.

I can fly airplanes and am a certified pilot. But that's not really a hobby. Too expensive and esoteric.

Other than that just basic shit. Outdoorsy stuff. Hunting, fishing, etc...

 

Damn bro, you got a lot of shit you are good at, a lot of good hobbies to occupy your time. What about teaching people
to fly, or teaching ANY of the other things you're good at? If you're good at certain things, maybe you can teach others who want to learn.

 

Because becoming a CFI takes shit tons of money and they don't make shit. I knew from day one that pursuing aviation as a career was a bad move. They literally work their asses to the bone and work for pennies. Your average regional airline captain makes less than I did parking cars at a valet stand. Google it. They require you to have thousands and thousands of hours to even get the job which costs hundreds of thousands of dollars. Its actually sickening how little pilots get paid. Plus, being a pilot doesn t make you cool. Its easier than driving a car. A blind chimp could do it.

None of this stuff is cool or impressive.

 

What were the results of your surgery?

 

Holy smokes, I didn't know that shit. I was under the impression that airline pilots made good money! What the hell?!
I don't have the guts to fly a fuckin plane, not sure I even care to try.

 

Well, that's a complicated answer. The impression is "fixed" I guess, but no surgery could ever bring it back to normal, or create a normal look. And as I've said, it's not just the concave chest you have to deal with. It s the other maladies that it does to your body that you have to live with as well. Its hard to describe. You just kind of have to see it/experience it for yourself.

 

In other words, I can no longer eat fruit loops out of my chest, but the impression is just the tip of the iceberg. It fucks your body up in many other ways.

 

Actually tbh, I wish i never had surgery. I wish I still had the bowl chest. It actually was better. It made more sense out of the odd body shape. And it was actually kind of cool. In high school people loved to push in on my shirt because it was different/cool. It was like the "empty abyss in my chest". They were doing it to be mean. People were genuinely fascinated by it. Now, I have the corrected chest along with the aftermath of what the deformity left behind - i.e. the curved back, deformed ribs, shoulders, etc... It looks ridiculous. My body from the waist up looks like someone cut out sections of five different people's bodies and made one body out of them. Its bizarre. Its a non-starter with women.

 

You could see yourself as a tragic figure such as The Phantom of the Opera, Cyrano de Bergerac, John Merrick, or you can live a normal life despite your condition
which does not limit longevity.


As for finding love, there’s a woman for every man

 

That's fantasy shit. People are always like "I'm sure girls have noticed you and were attracted to you but you just didn't know it." Yeah I doubt it. I truly do. I've never seen the first sign of it. If anything I've seen nothing but evidence to the contrary.

 

What?
Wrong.

Dude that's actually interesting.
You don't seem like an average joe and that's pretty cool.

 

You have potential to be reeeeallyyyy funny.
In a dark, cynical way.

Just don't become a total world-hater. Even if it's hard to resist the temptation.
People generally tend to be sucky, selfish and lame. And they tend to just use other people for whatever they need in their life atm - even emotionally. But I digress.

But yeah, don't become too bitter.

 

I rewrote your bio.
Want it here or PM?

 

OP should become an eunuch. He obviously has a hopeless mindset and too much sexual frustration.

 

Pm'll be good

 

^done

pls dont hate me

 

Also, like I already said, I hope you stay around.

 

I deleted tinder, and Snapchat, and Instagram. Complete wastes of time. Every online endeavor I've tried, whether it's POF, tinder, what have you... always complete wastes of time. Never had a single match on tinder. Never had a single reply to any messages. Pretty much the same as real life.

 

Dont you live on a farm? Have you tried farmersonly.com?

 

that's how dating sites work. a third of the profiles are fake, a third are women who have no interest in dating and are just looking for validation, and the third that are actually looking get flooded with so many messages that there's no way they can reply to most of them. in order to actually get a response, you have to send something out to every woman on the site and hope a couple of them bite.