This is just my opinion, so don't take it as fact. But your first error starts with the idea that death means that you stop existing...what if this just simply isn't true? Just a thought. Also, just kind of thinking out loud, but i'm curious about the spinal cord thing cause i have heard about this more than once. I wonder if it has something to do with awakening your kundalini? personally, i take such a notion seriously and i feel as though it's possible to tap in to such a power.
It never stops man. Once your mind has the fear in it it becomes deep seated until you liberate that fear with compassion. Its best to just acccept this as radically as possible otherwise you will drive yourself crazy. You will become so hyperaware of your own death by examining your temporality repeatedly that it wont even effect you anymore. You will understand that life and death are two sides of the same coin and cannot exist independent of eachother. Then you definitely wont be 'normal'.
Well prone actually gave me some solid advice, and some reasoning for that advice. That is more than I can say about you mr writer.
Yeah dude, I feel more power than I ever thought I would have in life. Don't mean to like rub it in and boost my ego about it, but something happened to me and I still don't understand it. When somebody is playing call of duty zombie attack, or probably any other horror movie for that matter, I can feel these emotions. Emotions of death. The more and more I feel these, the less and less control I have over my thoughts, and my actions. It really does suck kinda, because I used to love scary stuff and try to get myself as scared as I could. Thats something I am really going to miss. But I am a new person now, I thrive purely on good energy and love. When people try playing that zombie game, I can feel myself get closer and closer to death. The funny thing is, that the closer to death I get, the more powerful my hidden powers are. I can already feel them dying down, yesterday they were fully working to the point where I couldn't believe it. But today I feel slightly more normal. Do you guys think I should watch some horror movies or call of duty zombie attack so that I can get close to death and boost those powers again?? I love the power thing, but death is just so fucking scary and makes me cry. Im the dude who would smoke as much salvia as I could to get as scared as possible.
I can forgive u w/e, but I liked it when you used to make an effort in the advice you gave me. Now its always the same. Im not going to increase dose. I am avoiding psychedelics now, I am trying to learn my mind the way it is. Lsd is one of my favorite things in life, but now that I fucked wit my spinal chord any kind of psyche doesn't seem like the smartest idea.
this made me laugh out loud. But FreshDacre, i would imagine that the more you embrace those dark feelings the more they will become your light. You have to close the gap between you and death. merge with death. bash me all you want, but i honestly feel like more and more people my age are getting these same sorts of experiences. These dark entities that arise out of tripping. These mythical sort of symbols that are coming to life. FreshDacre's mushroom experience with the Grim Reaper seems on parallel avenues with my New Years Eve acid demented carnival ride. Perhaps this is the beginning of a new sub-culture. slowly but surely it is brewing. Something new and fresh and unprecedented. It's preparing us for 2012. Again, bash me all you fucking want i could give two shits. But i get these visions of the whole world crumbling before our eyes and right when all out panic ensues there will be a whole slate of kids who are like part of this freaky sub-culture. But it's not like a bad thing, it's like we merge with these petrifying archetypal symbols and start dressing up like jokers and thieves and satan and witches and start mocking the collective fears of humanity in order to sort of shock the fear out of our system. It would be like a roller-coaster or something or like a haunted house that you go to when you're a little kid. It's scary but it's a thrill at the same time. The generation above us will be shocked and won't know how to react but our message that we carry will be of true value. We're like the bridge between the deep seated collective fears of humanity and humanity itself. All this shit would start rising to the surface. All these biblical notions and symbols and archetypal shit that is deeply engraved into our psyche and sub-consious and conditioning. But i'm just rambling now. If i'm wrong about all of this it's like so what? But if this shit actually manifests just remember this thread... also, check out this...www.myspace.com/cosmosaic Listen to Sinners Never Win and A Joker's Manual. It has kind of given me those types of vibes that i just described above. But going into those recordings i wasn't thinking about that at all. It just kind of channeled itself through. Enjoy.
I really like the idea of me needing to just embrace and accept death. seems like the only way out of this fear I have. Tbh guys, my head is fucked up. I can't even be in the same room of people playing call of duty zombie wars. Life is way different now, but its still fun so am I really missing out I just am having a realllly hard time keeping up with my mind its like it went into ovahdrive.
This is just my opinion, but it's all about losing control over your mind. Because what is it that's trying to control the mind? The mind. And in turn you're struggling against yourself. I guess i'll use some of my favorite spiritual teacher's advice here: As long as the techniques and strategies work, use them. But the day will come when none of them will work. None of them.
This is where you have fucked up royally in the learning process. You have chosen to go WITH the fear, and you shun the advice of others when you NEED it the most. Your batty right now man, its obvious. Take the advice from the people who have been IN YOUR FUCKING SHOES. You wont be able to step outside the gloom unless you try to. Seems like your just trying to cope, deal, and rationalize this phase. Stop being a pussy, get up, do something about it. Increase dose or dont bother to ask for advice. Im sorry if I sound harsh but I have been there before.
Ok then thats prone's advice I like all of your advice guys, its just a matter of if you wanna help a brotha out or not. Don't give me advice if you don't think I'm worth it. Idk mabey you are right, but I really don't feel comfortable fuckin with my mind anymore.
Fuck yeah dude, I respect your opinion, but I like controlling life not the other way around. I have a lot of control in my life now, it seems like too much control even. And cool advice from the spiritual teacher, made me think. Fuck ya china cat you are a tru bromie.
Just look at it like this...you're going to have to face this fear head on SOONER OR LATER...so you might as well just surrender right now. There's no technique for this. Just be quiet and let it all bubble up to the surface. Stay really simple about it. Allow everything to be as it is. Including your resistance to what is. Don't resist the resistance. It's ok to resist, so just forgive yourself and let go.
