What do guys think about Waiting Til Marriage

Discussion in 'Free Love' started by WTM1987, Feb 6, 2018.

  1. scratcho

    scratcho Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

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    Once one is an adult, permission from others should/can not stop natural instincts.
     
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  2. Deidre

    Deidre Visitor

    Not a guy, but I'll offer my thoughts. I think it's a great choice, if the choice isn't coming from viewing sex as a shameful thing. Religion has a way of shaming people for having very basic sexual desires, and that isn't healthy.
     
  3. Kerri

    Kerri Members

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    Also not a guy but I think it’s a terrible idea. It sets up a scenario where your value as a partner is defined by your sexual choices rather than on your contributions as a whole person.
     
  4. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    Really? Because if you can be with someone without the sexual aspect being involved, then to me that oy shows something stronger than what most have already, and that's simple communication. To be with someone for years without sex, and still be happy, well then everything else about that relationship must be pretty solid and I can't see that relationship working by being valuing it being defined by a sexual choice.
     
  5. Total Darkness

    Total Darkness 100% Cocoa

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    Yep. From what i've read on the forums, its not uncommon for a relationship to break up because one becomes less sexually active or not active. Which tells me, that must've been the only thing holding the relationship together.
     
  6. trashed

    trashed Members

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    Just my opinion...if a relationship is still going and there's no sex, there's a particular reason.
    You can bet one is getting it somewhere else. And the other has either just given up on everything, or is biding their time till they can split.
     
  7. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Oi, with the communication

    What you described sounds more like best friends

    I can think of three friends in particular I have known for between 10 to 20 years. Not my favourite friends, thats usually reserved for whoever is pollishing mu knob at the time. None of us ever bother with relationships. But if something is on, we have the night off, a quick text message and ok, lets dot that

    The commonality has been that we all live within a couple streets away from each other. It certainly hasnt been simple communication, whatever the hell that is, certainly hasnt been a relationship thats "pretty solid", again whatever the hell that means. Its simply because they were there, close by

    You say pretty solid, I hear - oh you are both right there, to scared to change anything, meh, she'll do

    You say simple communication - your partner it totally honest about everything, all the time.....puhlease!
     
  8. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    My relationship has worked for 15+ years based on solid communication. No secrets, no anything, just open as can be. Seems to work for us. :)

    If you wanna be a negative Nancy about it go right ahead, but I'm just going to SMH.
     
  9. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Its solid communication now ;)

    Not being negative, not intentionally anyway

    Just dont what you are talking about, what is unsolid communication then? After 15 years together, what dont you know?
     
  10. Noserider

    Noserider Goofy-Footed Member

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    Sex is an awesome physical experience. And, shallow sounding or not, it IS an important component to a relationship.

    I look at it this way. You're new. You don't know me. Most of these other folks do. They'll probably roll their eyes at my analogy and go, "Really? That's what you came up with?"

    But they can kiss the fattest part of my ass.

    Anyway, imagine your goal was to make it to the NBA. Your dream in life was to play for the Boston Celtics. You worked out, were in great shape, you could run up and down the floor for 48 minutes without breaking a sweat; you knew all the plays--hell, you could coach the team if it came to that.

    But what if you said, "I'm waiting to get to the NBA before I take my first jump shot"?

    Do you want your first pro game to be the first moment you realize you can't shoot the ball?

    Sex is the same way. Sexual awareness is important. Everyone should know what they like, what they don't, what turns them on, etc. before committing to a relationship. You should know this about your partner. Because if you two are sexually incompatible--and married--now you're in trouble.

    I get it. You are Christian. I was raised Catholic. I too was told to wait until marriage. Of course, the Church won't recognize my impending marriage, so I blew them off.

    Anyhoo, I've been with the same woman since high school. We've experimented with all kinds of sexual things. Now we're getting married, and on our wedding night--after complaining that my sister drank too much and that her friend somehow managed to make it "all about her"--we'll have amazing sex. We're sexually dialed in. We get each other. We know how to satisfy one another.

    I guess the argument for waiting until marriage is that it's special to have sex for the first time with your spouse. I look at it like this: Whether you go into marriage a virgin or you go in as someone who got around more than the Beach Boys, the first time you make love to your married spouse is still the first time you make love to your married spouse. And that is what is special. That can never be taken away or diminished. Me, personally, would want to go into that situation with all the confidence, skills and sexual knowledge I can have.
     
  11. Total Darkness

    Total Darkness 100% Cocoa

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    Two people madly in love, sex is only one way of expressing it. Would the relationship end if your lover became disable and can't have sex anymore?
     
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2018
  12. TheGhost

    TheGhost Auuhhhhmm ...

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    LOL christians can't jump.
     
  13. Noserider

    Noserider Goofy-Footed Member

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    Not white Christians
     
  14. TheGhost

    TheGhost Auuhhhhmm ...

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    Hahahaha
     
  15. Just for fun

    Just for fun Live your best life

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  16. Just for fun

    Just for fun Live your best life

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    It's all about personal choice.
     
  17. Just for fun

    Just for fun Live your best life

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    Since you have become molded into a tight belief system where your free will is all but non=existent it is also very likely that you will expect your future mate to come into your exact same mold and behave as you do. I personally turn away from people locked in any restricting belief system. A child is born to blossom into what he was born to be. If placed into a mold as you have described is your case the endless possibilities that were available are now no more. So our first conversation would be our last. Sorry.
     
  18. crazytrain341

    crazytrain341 Members

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    You're asking this to a bunch of sex addicts?

    Lol isn't this like asking if you should buy a Ford on a Chevy message forum?
     
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  19. SantaCruzRob

    SantaCruzRob Supporters HipForums Supporter

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    I thank the goddess for ladies who don't wait for marriage. I would think there are a lot of grooms out there that owe me at least a thank you for training their bride in the ways of lusty sex and kinky ways. :p
     

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