What do you not allow in your house for your kids?

Great! I was afraid that you (and only you ) would see what I expressed as horrible, beacuse that's what Im hearing from the girls around here lol. Besides, that is how my culture goes, and that is how I was raised, I wasnt raised Muslim, more like ex-Muslim's who became atheist, but I was always shown by my stepdad and my mothers relationship that there was an equal balance and shared responsibility, but when it came to being a man when the situation calls for it, the man has to be a leader. And I feel that is Definitley being lost in our modern times here. I see all these guys being pushovers for their wive's, and it's pretty sad. Then they get screwed over and wonder "But I thought she loved me?!" Come one now, that is rediculous.

 

Oh, my kids love Kiki!

RELAYER, I think there are no relationships where everything is 50/50. I know people who actually keep score, for real. (They don't stay married long.)

I am a STRONG womyn. My dh is a STRONG man. There are things I am better at, like nurturing ect. He is strong and is as KC often expresses about her dh Dave, and "Alpha Male." That doesn't mean he owns me, or controls me, just that we have different roles in our marraige and in our childrearing.

No one should abuse a partner. I don't think shows where the womyn is abusive are funny, they make me squirm. I hate things like King of Queens as much as I hate The HoneyMooners. "To the Moon Alice, POW BOOM!" Damn, that's violent shit, and I hate it. Neither is right.

If a kid is sick, I take care of them. (IF there is puke, Bear certainly helps out, as I can't handle puke.) If there is a noise downstairs in the middle of the night, he goes.

 

There ya go. Exactly what Im saying. It just seems like more and more people are falling off of this way of living. I mean sure, women are the stronger sex inside, and once ruled the world, and now are coming back, and mens ego's are what the control issue is blah blah, but when it comes to the basic nature of a human being, there are different roles that should be accepted by both sides, and in MY opinion, they should not be questioned. In my previous relationships, sure I may have been a tad bossy, but only when I felt it was nessecary, and I have NEVER been abusive. But when a girl is being lazy AND giving me orders, I say chop chop or get the F*** out of my house. Not in a funny or abusive way, just straight up. And when I have done wrong, I accept it and move on, no complaining.

 

Just the boys? Because the world the girls will be living in is, what? Venus?

 

You dont REALLY think that's what I meant do you? Im sorry if you do. Although I must say, my ex fiance sure gave out a lot of orders, well at least she tried to, and she opened her mouth once in a restaraunt and forced me into a situation where I was required to fight 3 men, all of which were a lot bigger than I, and she did nothing but watch after she said all the tough things she felt like saying. But hey, that's just one girl

 

You see, you didn't really clarify what you DID mean. Do you think that the boys need to be taught how to defend/protect themselves but that the girls don't?

If my Uncle hadn't sat me down and taught me how to throw a left hook some very nasty things would have happened to both myself and my friends!

 

No way! I would never belive that, I firmly belive that man and woman are equal. Im just saying, that earlier in my posts on this thread, I stated that the one thing I dont let my son see, is other men being ordered around by their signifacant others. But that doesnt mean that I think men should order around women. The whole issue came up only because Maggie agreed with me, its not something I see to often, but I see it in certain cases, and I find it just as bad as when men use women because they are lazy/egotistical/whatever the case may be. Please, dont think Im a jerk! I didnt mean anything bad towards women, I just should have cleared up my comments.

 

Oh, don't worry... it would take more than that to cause me to think you a jerk!

A lot of men DO seem to think that there are different rules for boys than there are for girls. For example, a boy can have a midnight curfew, but the girl needs to be home by 10pm. Just seeing if you had a double standard too!

 

Well now, I cant say lol! Since I dont have a girl. Hmmm.......I'd have to think long and hard about that to answer you, bcause as of right now, I dont know what kind of parent I would be had I a daughter. But when I think about it, it seems like I might just be a little, A LITTLE, over protective. So I guess, yea I may have some different ideas about girls when they are young, but your right, there is just as many bad things out in the world happening to both sexes.

 

eh maggie, I'm not big on those ones, i'm talking more like silly symphonies and merry melodies.. just fun whimsical cartoons~~ like a mouse that wants wings so he can fly like a bird, jack frost vs. the sun when spring comes along, cupcake girl becoming queen of candy world, animals on the farm, stuff like that... oh and dtv. where they piece old disney cartoons to oldies music like the mamas and the papas, stevie wonder, etc.. Stuff I really liked as a kid and want to share with him. Also have to add in my son loves spirited away and kikis~~ we even named our newest kitty Haku (not sure if the spelling is right) lol
I can see where you're coming from with stuff like looney tunes and tom and jerry, yes there is a lot of violence in them, but it's portrayed pretty unrealistically and I know i never as a child took it to my head that if you "blow someone up or shoot them they're just gonna look charred" It's just silly entertainment to me, I'm sure they haven't sparked violent tendencies in the vast majority of kids who watched them, most kids realize that the results from the violence in those movies is not what really happens... if not, well i guess they need some life lessons then

 

OK, I misunderstood. I like those old fashioned fantasy cartoons.

I have a freind who hates ANYTHING new,(She's one of those people who thinks anything made after she graduated high school is trash) and lets her son watch all these "blow people up and laugh at it" old cartoons, like Tom and Jerry and he already has issues with aggression, (he would have anyway, but we know that kids who already have predisposition to aggression will be MORE influenced by violence on TV as well as more desensitized to the suffering of others)

I like the REALLY old stuff. The 20s and 30s era stuff, like you described. But, some of the new stuff is good, also. Not that there isn't crap. The ONLY show I have ever used my "Block Show" thing on my cable is an insipid lump of excrement called "Drake and Josh." It is the most idiotic crap I have ever seen, and it is so offensive to the intelligence of a child, that I took drastic action with it.

 

Drake & Josh - eugh, agreed!


I also don't appreciate shows like Fairly Oddparents that show the parents as abject morons. Just doesn't seem likely to foster respect towards ANYONE to me.
love,
mom

 

Okay, I have a question for you guys - For those of you who shy away from both television and video games...

Given a choice between your child watching something educational on TV (be it in the vein of "Sesame Street" or "History Channel") or playing an educational video game ("Oregon Trail" comes to mind, as well as something like "Lemonade Stand") - what would you nudge your child toward?

This came into my mind when I was thinking about what Kathi said about interactive vs. passive toys. I remember playing a lot of those games when I was young, and while they weren't active in the physical sense that Legos and Linkin' Logs are, they did have me actively exercising my brain, and I think I got a lot out of it.

 

If it werent for Sim City, I would have no idea how rural, suburban, and urban, commercial, residential, or industrial zones are built. That game taught me more as a child than any school ever did on the subject.

 

I'm really trying not to think of everything in terms of restriction, but rather, moderation.

If Moire comes across something I don't agree with, I want to have a discussion about WHY I don't like it. Why those princess movies don't really do women justice, or why it's wrong for the woman in King of Queens to be mean to her husband, etc.

I really don't like the idea of gaming systems, but then I saw how my brother grew up, constantly on one, never leaving his room, and it just sickens me. But I also realise games, in moderation, might be a good idea.

I'm still learning this whole parenting thing. But the one thing I know is, I hate Bratz Dolls.

 

Man my daughters love Tom and Jerry. We don't see any aggresion coming from it at all. We don't ban this kind of stuff because it is impossible anymore to keep children sheltered from society. I would rather them be watching something and be able to comment on it then them sneaking to friends house to watch it. My kids are too young yet, oldest is 6, to get into the music issues. The only things that are definitely banned are the toys, clothes and shows that push the sexualization of children. Like bratz, shorts with writing on the butt, and panties with cherries on them.

 

I still watch Tom & Jerry, even when my ex has the babe on the weekend. Nothing wrong with that show. Actually, everything about it is great!

 

Hummblebee, I think it depends on the game or show specifically. For an 11 year old, something like watching Cyberchase versus playing 30 minutes of Carmen Sandiego could be a toss-up. But for a 6 year old, Cyberchase is pretty much "just another show" because most of the concepts are still over her head. Likewise, I don't think my 11 year old is getting much out of Between the Lions anymore, but we actually schedule our lunchbreak around when it's on because I feel it's that helpful for my daughter.
love,
mom

 

my five year old loves LOVES cyberchase. Time Warp Trio, too. But she's far from ordinary, and definitely understands the math concepts in Cyberchase, and the history in Time Warp Trio, too.

to answer Humblebee's question, it's up to my kids whether they'd rather watch tv or play on the computer. I don't consider either activity to be educational so much as entertainment. They only choose shows and games that claim to "teach" concepts they already know. When it's up to me, I generally suggest we make some art, and the girls almost always think it's a great idea.

 

I loved all the classic looney toons, and wished they were still on. Once i got an N64, my parents would limit my playing, especially for goldeneye (my only shooter), to about 30 minutes to an hour. I was never really limited on the computer, because until a few years ago i wasn't really on it much. my playing video games and computer games has picked up since i was about 12 or 13, but not to a point where it has a major impact on my life.
Ever since I burned alot of my time over the summer on a mmorpg, I'm making sure not to get back into one. These things can be extremely addictive and a complete waste of time. Just endlessly training and leveling, the most social interaction you have with people is just text-chatting. I'll never get into that again.