What will you not put up with from people

That was so touching, KC. I can relate alot to what you said there.

 

Dishonesty. Back-stabbing. Making fun of people.

 

KC, I love that. I can relate 100%...it's part of why I am so hesitant to form close friendships unfortunately.

 

i finally decided that i give up on adjusting my behavior to suit other people who will not do the same for me. why bother? i'm not going to elaborate on other people's every opinion or point of view. once they say it, why do i have to reiterate it and reply to it? it's said. it's out. it's over. move on to the next step. that's not ignoring someone, that's absorbing the information and moving forward, changed or unchanged, with that knowledge. the problem with some people is they expect every exchange of ideas or opinions has to be soul changing, hashed and rehashed to the point of meaninglessness. i don't see the point. there's communication, then there's rambling on because you like the sound of your education.

 

Yeah.

 

Hmm yeah , if its just someone who likes the sound of their voice then I agree with u.And you're right about people who won't adjust and insist on enjoying a "balance of power".

But I've also seen how feuds can eat away at people inside.Friends , family , couples.My father and his mother didnt speak for nearly 30 years , til just before she died.He's an ignorant bugger but she was too.All the shit in the war and the fact that she was foreign ,and he never understood her not adopting to British ways didnt help.Alot of faults but ALOT was a festering misunderstanding that really should have been solved.

I've seen it with people.The energy that sustains the feud is the resentment and frustration alot of the time - on both sides that it wasnt resolved earlier.The unwillingness to set the ball rolling.
Sometimes u just wanna lock people in a room together- or "bang their heads together" as we say in England...LOL
U know?

 

weelll, that works in some situations, for sure. i'm a big believer in knocking it out and getting over it. but what happens when you get over it? sometimes it's just over. bad feelings don't really linger all the time. you just go your seperate ways.

btw, my parents are still trying to kill each other. 23 years and still at it! i'm so proud.

 

I think both walking away ends up with the energy just eating away inside so often.I've seen it utterly destroy people inside.That doesnt fade away IMO.But it depends whats fuelling the lingering feelings.
Some people are just idiots and dont care how they offend people , u know?( like violent people etc)

Yeah my parents have always been married too.And always terrible rowing
( Maybe my mother took on the role of my father's mother ?- not wishing to go all Sigmund Freud on it...LOL)
In work I could row all day and it wouldnt bother me an ounce.
But I really hate big rows if they ever happen with friends and gf's.
Sort of makes me feel ill , really drained.

 

i'm really not that deep, to be fully honest. i buried a lot for a long time. i don't do it anymore. sometimes people will get blown away a bit, but what's left behind in me a fertile ground for a new friendship. i wouldn't know how to hold a grudge, my feelings just end.

 

Disrespect.

I'd break someones legs over a little disrespect.

 

Werd and also forced/loud ignorance.

 

how u mean?I'm either grudge or no grudge.And lingering suspicion usually...

Except with nutcases - like people who try and stick glasses in people's faces etc.But those are the types I know I cant trust, even before I've seen sthg bad.

 

remove the weed and there's room for a more desirable flower.

 

same for me. it's like something turns off and you know the relationship is over. there's no more resentment but you know there's nothing else to share there either.

one thing that I try to weed out of my life is toxic people, people who don't take responsibility for their own crap and project everything on others, and people who act with maliciousness & cruelty. yeah, sometimes you can't have the flowers until you do some weeding and make room for them. nice analogy KC.

 

I take responsibility for my crap in a very self-destructive way.

 

whatcha mean Neo?

 

I'm just a self-destructive guy. It's how I react to things. I guess I like to make sure things could not be any worse before I set out to fix them. How the hell did I evolve to this point haha.

 

I've done a lot of self sabotaging stuff in my life. *sigh* I think I've stopped doing that for the most part though, but... I'm alot older now.

 

My self-pity used to be the reason I did those things. Now I do them because I don't really give a shit and can't get motivated to do anything about my problems. I just let them build and build until they seem hopeless, and then at that point I really don't want to fix them anymore anyways, regardless of what happens.

Although, I used to do self-destructive things in the name of almighty "experience".

 

Do you think maybe you're being rebellious sometimes? I still get that way from time to time. And I've learned not to try to stifle it... but give it space to express itself. It can really feel good to just get it out of your system. I've lived for way too long trying to be "spiritually correct". Fuck that! A prison for sure.