Who can I help on here, and how?

Yummy mmmm I love chocolate cake mmmmm Shivaya that is very thoughtful of you to think of others

 

Pleasure!

thank you

 

Thanks attractive boyman fae!



Feel free to come to shivaya for all your advice needs!

 

can you blame me?
haha

 

I'm in desperate need of help. I really need to see fae's man boobs.

Its urgent. Thanks

 

hahaha

 

I'm blind now.... Thanks for that.

 

Hi!

Twenty 16oz bars of Gold Bullion would be rather cool - I can pay some toward DHL costs?

Will look forward to hearing from you - thanks!

 

Excellent post, its nice to see a selfless spirit, when all too many people just want to think of themselves.
Unfortunately I'm in need of some help myself.Alas, I found no wisdom elsewhere... : (

PART ONE
Right, I'm due a holiday, and living in Britain, somewhere with the Sun is always a winner. So I thought, take a few friends away, find somewhere nice. Now hotels can be notorious killjoys, atleast in regards what I like to do on holiday. Solution? A nice private villa.

Now being a considerate type of guy, I wanted a nice place for my friends to stay at. So I thought, maybe number 4 or preferably number 2 on this list.
http://www.toptenz.net/top-10-most-expensive-homes-in-the-world.php

Now my grandma always told me that renting is such a waste of money.So obviously buying is the sensible choice, yes?

So I emailed the sales agent, wishing to show an empathetic side. I wrote, "Dear Mr du Pont, may I first extend my sympathies that your community has had to suffer the ignimony of this Russian mafiosky who has contributed nothing whatsoever, other than billions of euros being thrown about. In contrast, I am sure I would be welcomed with open arms by the French Riviera, not least because I once achieved basic fluency in Spanish. Which I understand is a little similar to French".

I continued,
"I understand Mr Mafiosky rarely visits the villa. So if he'd like to move his shitty old paintings, his drugs and his disease ridden prostitutes out by Thursday, I can move in the next day. Altho' he may like to leave some of these items in the East wing for collection at a later date. Ofcourse this will stop the risk of smelly squatters moving in too won't it. Then a few weeks later, when I'm sure everything's in order, we can sort out the boring paperwork side?"

Reply from them? "Dear Sir, we are not prepared to commence negotiations until full proof of funds has been supplied by your bankers. Furthermore, although never resident here, Mr Kalashnikov would not be prepared to allow you to occupy the property until funds from the full asking price are received in full".

WTF! "Excuse me?", I thought. I won't buy a new car without a test drive. And my supermarket lets me taste a 70 pence slice of cheese before buying it. But he thinks I'm gonna wire all that money without even having tested the joint out !!!. Best part is, the place is FUCKING EMPTY ANYWAY. What a thoughtless pair of bellends!

When I'm buying a sofa, I don't flash a big wad of money and shout over "I've got the cash here, can I sit down and try it?"
I feel like I'm dealing with children.

PART TWO
Being a forward planning type of guy I'd decided I'd need some toys for my stay at the villa. Now X-box and all that is fine, but frankly I prefer to stare at other things. Like this:-
http://www.channel5.com/shows/home-and-away/characters/indigo-walker

So I had someone fire off an email to her management saying she was required for some (cough) consultancy work promoting vital "Anglo-Australian relations", at Villa Leopolda next month.

You'd have thought such generosity would elicit a pleasant response.Yes?

NOPE. I was told by them "Miss Weaving is a serious actress and was quite offended by your suggestion that she is available on a "for hire" basis. Nor is she aware of any need to prevent Anglo-Australian militarised conflict, under the auspices of any United Nations directive or otherwise".

Wow. Some people eh? And as for the "serious actress" bit, bitch p-llleeease. The cast of the show "Home and Away" is even more wooden than the scenery...
If I wanted an Aussie comedian, I'd have picked that Barry Humpries guy.. aka Dame Edna Everidge.

Makes me wonder why I bother sometimes...

THE SOLUTION?
Now I thought I had it all sorted. Nice hol for me and my friends. French community rid of an undesirable.
Nice house made safe from squatters. Estate agent shows he's making progress on a house that looks pretty unsellable at that truly idiotic price. And an actress with minor potential is rescued from the hell of the most unwatchable tv show since Shortland Street.( The last 9 episodes were really shit btw... So I'm told).

I do feel negotiations with Mr Kalashnikov's and Miss Weaving's people are at an advanced stage. But is it any wonder the world is in such moral and economic crisis? People can be sooooo selfish. Only thinking of themselves. Why can't they be more like me?

Mr Kalashnikov is being a right dog in a manger. Crying about a house that he never uses, but wants a zillion dollars for. Which'll probabaly be invaded by gypsies if he doesn't get his act together soon.
And Miss Weaving is a 22 year old woman who'd rather play "Lets pretend" all day.

For some crap TV show set on a beach, thats probably only watched by perverts and idiots..

Hmm.

Thanks and looking forward to your wise enlightenment and advice Guru Shivaya.

 

...... weirdest trolling in the history of trolls.

Atleast some of you came with real questions

 

rent is due. hahahaha. :smilielol5:

no but seriously, this is very nice of you


i wish i had a question though.

i'll think of something.

 

I have one for ya Shivvy

So I told people (including some super gorgeous babe) that I will be out in their state by this weekend (definitely by my friend's bday on the 3rd) and that it will be fun.

But my parents now, out of nowhere, are like - totally stay here a week. My dad will help me get some work, after making it seem like he couldn't do that for me. And he says he wants to go hunting after he previously said he probably wouldn't make it out. I really want money, I really want to go hunting.

But I also feel somewhat obligated to be out of state to meet my friend (babe), meet my friend (birthday) and be looking for a job.

I feel like I need as much time as possible in CO to get stuff ready (primarily clean out potential studio space and insulate it) before winter comes.

What do you think man? Should I stay out of a whim because my dad tells me he (might) get me work? Or should I go and hope I get a job ASAP?

 

Was that what that was? Holy shit I was so confused.

 

how can i stop procrastinating so much

 

I knew something wasn't right. Call yourself a guru?
I give u 0 out of 10!

Scientologists and Nation of Islam forums gave me some concrete advice. Altho' admittedly, I probably won't be taking it...

 

Is there any way you can do both? The 3d is monday. What if you look for work today and tomorrowand then leave to see your friend and the babe on sunday, and go hunting later in the week or next weekend... is that a possibility?

Make a list of what you need to do and do it as soon as you get up in the morning or as soon as you come home from work. Just get it out of the way. Reward yourself once it is done.

Also, this only applies if you are a stoner, but what helps for me is smoking the ganja only once everything that needs to be done is done. It also plays the role of the reward :2thumbsup:

 

How do I develop a healthy mature communication style? I'm non confrontational and a huge pussy unless I'm pushed too far or I'm really comfortable with someone, then I'm blunt and rude and either too cold or too emotionally charged.

I have no idea how to discuss a problem like a rational person. I hide from it until I explode.

I never really cared before but I'm about to have a baby and I want to teach him to handle problems with others like a normal person

 

Shyness mainly. I'm good at jokingly around and being light and happy around people but when things get serious I clam up and I'm afraid to talk about anything

 

I want to tell you a story that you may want to keep in mind.

I like to tease my friends alot. We're boys, that's what we do. I have one friend in particular who is a bit different from us. He's actually more advanced than we are to be honest. While we were doing drugs and working construction, he was in university becoming an actuary. He moved to the big city two hours away and he's making the big bucks now.

He comes back to visit fairly often and I was always fucking with him about the fact that he was an actuary and cracking jokes about him and his calculator and so on. He always kinda snickered. He is very docile as well and not very confrontative.

One day another friend of ours told me he thought the actuary guy was getting fed up with my jokes. I didn't think it was the case, but I decided to talk to him about it anyways, just to make sure we were cool.

Turns out he told me he was EXTREMELY annoyed with my jokes, and admitted that he had started visiting us less and less not because he was busy with work as he said, but because he'd always just end up feeling different and left out and sad that we are poking fun at him.

So here I was, thinking we were all having fun, when in reality, this one guy was boiling on the inside, starting to gradually hate us and not wanting to visit anymore. Keep in mind this is one of my best friends. do you have any idea how shitty that felt?

My first reaction was - ''dude wtf, why didnt you tell me about this?''. He was embarassed. Just like you. In reality, if he would have told me, of COURSE I would have stopped. I would have stopped right away without hesitation. Why would I want to be hurting my friend? Luckily we talked about it before it was too late and we are cool now, but that could have been a ruined friendship - just because he wasnt comfortable talking about the fact that he was actually being hurt.

The moral of this story, meliai, is that the people that matter, will not only tolerate what you have to communicate with them - they actually WANT TO KNOW HOW YOU FEEL.

Keeping these things to yourself is not only unhealthy for you, but for the relationship as a whole.

Just keep that in mind. And practise. Start small maybe, and take notice when you DO set some boundaries - even miniscule ones. Start focusing on that stuff. Notice that when you express discontent naturally, no one freaks out - it's all good in the hood.

Go into it with loving intent, and everything will work out.



=========================

ALternatively, would you consider yourself a sensitive person? As in if you are inadvertenly doing something that bothers someone and they tell you about it - would you be extremely embarassed, hurt, and upset?

If this is the case, it may be that you are simply projecting your own experience on to others. If it is such a huge event when someone singles you out and points out one of your flaws, it is entirely uderstandable that you may not want to get into it when the situation is reversed because of the impact you think it will have on the person or your relationship with them.

The paradox here is that if there is someone around you who can be a bit of a bully, or simply someone who ''takes alot of room'' in the relationship, odds are they WONT be as sensitive as you are and WONT be hurt if you respectfully communicate your boundaries.

The person who is timid and a push-over likely is that way because they are as sensitive as you and are unlikely to be stepping on your toes. The person who is insensitive, loud, and maybe even a bit of a bully, is most likely used to confrontation and can handle it well. It may be useful to simply be aware of that.

I may be completely off because I don't have all the details of your personality. If I am, I apoligize...

==============================

 

Very nice. You are quite the guru.

I am very sensitive. I can't stand it when people are mad or upset at me, and I don't want to make anyone feel like I'm mad at them. I also don't have a very high tolerance for drama, and sometimes I feel like by confronting someone about how I feel I'm creating unneccessary drama.

Thanks for the advice, o wise one. I'll take it to heart.